Lunarpages Web Hosting Sucks Ass

A few years ago my coworker and I were requested by our boss to research some web hosting companies to host our corporate websites. Our current plan was about to expire and it didn't offer many of the tools and features of some other companies. After some research we narrowed it down to Lunarpages. Their company sounded great. They were cheap. They offered huge amounts of space and bandwidth. They had a lot of features on their control panel that helped monitor traffic and whatnot... it seemed like a great idea to go with this company.

So, some time later, one of our divisions decided to build their own website and use Lunarpages as its host. Lunarpages appeared to them as it did to us - a low-cost service with nearly every conceivable server option they could ever need. Slowly but surely, Lunarpages began to build itself as the crappiest web hosting company EVER.

First incident: This actually happened to the guy who worked on that divisions website before me but he relayed this bit of information. I should have known this incident would herald things to come.

The site database got wiped out. Don't ask me how it happened. It just did, it wasn't Lunarpages fault, it wasn't really anyone's fault... it just happened. No big deal. Shit happens. Just restore the backup and everything will be good to go.

WRONG!

This guy who built the site before me called up Lunarpages and told them he needed a database restore. There isn't much of a story here other than he sat on hold for quite some time, spoke with a tech support person who was completely incompetent, and eventually got a helpdesk ticket submitted. It then took four days to get the SQL database restored.

Seriously? Four days? Come on... it's a fucking button. Lunarpages strike 1.

Second Incident: So I'm working with one of our other division's websites when I discover I'm having some major connection issues, especially with the administrator control panel. Frustrated I eventually call Lunarpages helpdesk. After a very long time on hold I eventually get through to someone who sounds like a 19-year-old fresh out of high school kid who barely kowns anything about technology. After a few hours on the phone with the kid we EVENTUALLY came to the realization that I need to have certain firewall ports open on my computer in order to interface with the Lunarpages control panel correctly.

That may not sound like a HUGE deal... but it's actually a network security liability and, since my company has a network with a couple hundred computers on it, my IT department was a little hesitant to open the ports. The eventually did but were extremely unhappy about it. Lunarpages strike 2.

Third Incident: So eventually the website gets handed off to me and I'm FTPing files here and there. For some reason my files aren't getting uploaded correctly if at all even though my login and password are correct.

So, I call Lunarpages tech support. I wait on hold for god-know how long before getting in touch with another 19-year old who immediately asks me if I'm using FileZilla...

You see, Lunarpages FTP works best with one of the crappiest FTP programs that exist: FileZilla. It kinda works with other FTP programs but don't even think about using Dreamweaver because that DEFINITELY doesn't work... or more appropriately, it will work one day, not work the next, then it will work for a couple hours the next day before not working for the rest of the day and so on.

I download and install FileZilla - crap FTP software. It works but I'm timed out for no reason or every time I want to upload more than 20-some megs of information... whichever comes first. Lunarpages Strike 3.

Fourth Incident: Eventually the guy I mentioned from incident 1 hands his website off to me. I'm good to go, ready to rock and I'm working to bust this site out as soon as possible. I get the site up and running and we're bug testing when suddenly we discover that the website can e-mail to every e-mail extention (@aol.com, @hotmail.com, @gmail.com, etc.) EXCEPT the COMPANY for which the site is built. So, if my site were built for the company NinjaMasters I could not e-mail to bob@ninjamasters.com.

Why? I have no fucking clue. I'm talking with IT, Lunarpages, the URL registry, our company e-mail people... everyone. I decide to investigate from the ground up and ask for the e-mail logs of my Lunarpages web server.

Nope. I'm sorry. You can't have them.

 

Why? Why can't I have my e-mail logs? I need to know if the SERVICE my company is PAYING for is WORKING. You can tell me it is but I need to see that it is. Needless to say, I never did get the e-mail logs. Lunarpages Strike 4.

Fifth Incident: I get back from vacation to find that the website I've been working on doesn't show any images. Every page is completely fucked so I go into the FTP site to see what's up. The images are there but every file has an FTP date corresponding to a time where I was sitting in an inner tube in the middle of a lake 100 miles from civilization.

So why aren't my images showing? Because my website is infected with the Exploit.JPEG virus and my companies virus protection will not allow me to view my images. Now, my companies security makes the pentagon look like a grade school (not really, but it's pretty fucking good) and there is NO WAY my website became infected through my machine.

The ONLY way for my website to get infected was through the Lunarpages server poor security. What's worse; god-knows how many people accessed my website while it was infected and did not have security of their own to prevent infection. I called them up to get more information and... not surprisingly, Lunarpages was NOT helpful AT ALL and denied any responsibility on their part.

"Someone may have hacked your site sir."
"Your computer must be infected with a virus sir."

The next day they sent me a helpdesk response telling me I can't see my images because I have broken image links. I cried a little inside when I considered that these were the people that my multi-million dollar company was relying on for our web marketing needs.

My IT department and I theorize that Lunarpages transferred all the files from one server to another using a batch transfer. They turned off virus protection to expedite the process and every directory within the site became infected. When I probed for information on this possibility it was denied... but I could tell the individual I was speaking with was not telling me everything (probably covering his companies ass from any liability).

BULLSHIT. Lunarpages Strike 5.

My company has decided to move our web hosting in-house. The cost in man-hours invested in dealing with Lunarpages pile of steaming shit company MORE than makes up for the cost in equipment to host everything here. My recommendation as a web developer - if you see a website with a thumbnail advertisement for Lunarpages web hosting... check your virus protection because it's probably infected with the Explot.JPEG virus.

Oh, and choose someone, ANYONE else for your web hosting needs.

Tagged with: Fail, Lunarpages, Web Host