Online Dating

Sometimes when I’m really bored at work I surf myspace’s Love and Relationships forums. Generally there are bizarre topics like; Why do men like sex? Or Why do women not like fat men? Questions which, apparently, need to be answered. I sometimes try and give meaningful and positive feedback which, I’m sure, is usually lost among the 500; “WTF? U R a Retard! LOLZ!" replies.

One thread of questioning which constantly amazes me is the question of online dating through social networking sites such as Myspace. I don’t quite understand why people don’t sit back and look at the big picture of where culture is heading. The internet is the most profound technological achievement of our lifetimes and people still don’t fully understand what that means.

Every single year retailers report increased revenue through ecommerce than the prior year. Annalists credit a variety of reasons for this; convenience among the most prominent reasons. Why is it hard to understand that what works for the consumer world also works in the world of love. People, by nature are... well... PEOPLE.

For better or for worse social networking sites like myspace is the future of dating. The generation of our children will be astounded that people found relationships without social networking online in previous generations. Our children will look to us and ask; “how did you find your husband/wife by confining yourself to a social network of 100+ people you come in face to face contact with on a day to day basis?” They will probably, in honesty, have healthier and stronger relationships as a result of what online dating or “e-love” provides.

The advantages are too numerous and significant to list but consider just a few...

You can have a genuine conversation via IM or e-mail. You don’t have to try and shout over blaring music in a club or bar. Lets face it, if you aren’t interested in talking to someone, you’re only interested in fucking them... which is FINE... but if that’s not what you’re looking for that bars and clubs are not the way to go for you.

Knowing someone’s status and motivation in the real world is difficult. Of course I can potentially make a new friend in someone who is attached by striking up a conversation with her in a bar but my OWN intentions are not to make new friends who already have boyfriends. Online people generally have their status and intentions listed on their profile. Shoot them a message and, if they like how you look or what you have to say, maybe you’ll get a message back... if not, no big deal... just find someone else who is interested.

The anonymity of the internet provides people who have trouble talking to the opposite sex a venue for overcoming their fear. I don’t have trouble talking to girls in bars/clubs/wherever but many people do. For some reason the internet provides a safety net that gives them courage. One emerging trend that I’ve noticed is that of WOMEN taking the initiative to talk to ME. Usually I’m the one who does the dirty work… I’m a guy, I have to break the ice, I have to approach a woman... the responsibility is MINE... online it’s a totally different ball game.

You can social network without spending any money. How many times have you bought a drink for a chick and found she wasn’t interested or was NOT the chick for you?

You can get to know someone over a long period of time, days, weeks or months before meeting in person. This gives people the opportunity to know if they are compatible. Of course people can misrepresent themselves over the internet but that is ALSO something people can do in real life... just in a different way. I’ve known plenty of people I’ve met face to face who’ve set themselves up as someone they later turn out not to be.

Meeting people online and even forming relationships online is far more common than most people think. As ecommerce has grown to an unprecedented rate in the past decade, e-love will also grow significantly. Simple fact, plug in or punch out. The new millennium is here and we don’t fuck like we did in the 1900’s.

Nothing changes the fact that two people will eventually have to meet in person. Online interaction can not replace that... but it can facilitate it and it can facilitate it in a healthier and more meaningful way that in prior generations without social networking.

Tagged with: bars, clubs, e-love, myspace, relationships, sex, social networking